An awesome game and foolish games

Well the ballgame ended up being awesome. The final score was 33-30 in favor of us. We was the first team to defeat this school and our boys have only been beaten once and that was in the 8th quarter, yes went into 4 overtimes and only lost by 3 pts. I’ve said it once and sure ill say it again, we have some kick ass boys that play ball. Well still nothing much to report I guess, tomorrow is Friday J but then it’s the weekend L not always such a joyous part of the week . Me and my mom have not been on good speaking terms all week and it don’t seem to be getting a lot better, and me and “tumbling dice” haven’t been clicking along real well the past several days, talk was better tonight but not to sure how I feel about it. I’ve had a lot of mixed emotions with this fuss that I’m not sure I have had in the past. Today was especially odd, had been feeling pretty numb for the most part but some really major events took place at the school his daughter attends and it was like scalding water thrown in my face, reality of the fact that I still have so many feelings in their direction, concerns that I guess are pretty much not warranted from me, but its like I cant help it. They really do mean so much to me, the feelings are just not mutual and that makes life difficult at times. There has been a point in time that I really thought there might be a chance of being more than friends, but every time I have that notion, he inadvertently changes my mind. I’m very thankful for his friendship, don’t get me wrong, I just have a lot of feelings for them that are much deeper than just friendship and in a way I am torturing myself emotionally with the situation. But anyway its not a topic that I can dwell on, I’ve done that way to much as it is and its only brought a few grey hairs and many tears and not accomplished a thing by it, so anyway one more day comes and passes pretty much like the last 3 yrs have. He brought up the fact that for the most part my life is in some sort of turmoil most of the time, whether it be from the direction of my mom, work or him and sometimes all of the above….I guess I cope ok with it most of the time, I’ve not lost my mind yet anyway and actually have some pretty rational thoughts from time to time, so guess it could be worse.
Well guess I should wind this down. I would like to share a set of song lyrics with you guys tonight. Its not a new song, but one that I have downloaded onto my mp3 player. it’s a very awesome song that feels familiar at times



Artist: Jewel
Album: Pieces Of You
Title: Foolish Games


You took your coat off and stood in the rain
You were always crazy like that
I watched from my window
Always felt I was outside looking in on you
You were always the mysterious one with dark eyes and careless hair
You were fashionably sensitive, but too cool to care
Then you stood in my doorway, with nothing to say
Besides some comment on the weather
Well in case you failed to notice, in case you failed to see
This is my heart bleeding before you, this is me down on my knees
These foolish games are tearing me apart
Your thoughtless words are breaking my heart
You're breaking my heart
You were always brilliant in morning
Smoking your cigarettes and talking over coffee
You philosophies on art, Baroque moved you

You loved Mozart and you'd speak of your loved ones
As I clumsily strummed my guitar
You'd teach me of honest things
Things that were daring, things that were clean
Things that knew what an honest dollar did mean
So I hid my soiled hands behind my back
Somewhere along the line I must've gone off track with you
Excuse me, think I've mistaken you for somebody else
Somebody who gave a damn, somebody more like myself
These foolish games are tearing me apart
You're tearing me, tearing me, tearing me apart
Your thoughtless words are breaking my heart
You're breaking my heart
You took off your coat and stood in the rain
You were always crazy like that


Thought of the day

You give me wings
Of gladness and
Lend me spirit song.

-Sydney Russell


God bless you all and keep you safe

Gem ;)